Here's A Movie Comedy Waiting To Be Made

USA Today wrote a story on the massive theft problem mall stores face from organized thieves. (It's easier to steal from a Wal-Mart than burglarize a home and if you're caught the penalities are much lower.) But in the middle, they told this anecdote:

One night last August, Beall's [department store] cameras caught a gang of exotic dancers that stole about $170 worth of goods from the Bradenton store, police records show. Apparel from other retailers filled the women's rented SUV. Two of the three women, who worked for an exotic dancing and escort service called Black Xtasy, admitted that they were traveling the state to steal. The suspected ringleader had retail theft warrants against her in two other Florida counties.

A gang of exotic dancers running a shoplifting ring? They're working the poles at night and that's their COVER? If that's not a comedy waiting to be made, I don't know what is.